Will this serve me?
This week I heard a great quote from a coach in another field talking about asking yourself before you take an action “Will this serve the path that I want to be on?”
It hit a chord, as when it comes to weight loss, once you have balanced your hormones and can trust the signals your body sends you and your body starts functioning as it should, the rest of what you need to manage for is emotional/habitual eating. And this question provides a great filter to run your decisions through.
So often when we have a goal our brain likes to offer up lots of reasons why we shouldn’t take the action we need to take in order to achieve our goal.
But why is this? It is because our brain doesn’t like new things. It wants to keep you safe and thinks what is known is safe.
I remember when I was first trying to lose weight, as the day or week progressed and I got tired from resisting all of the things I would normally eat, my brain would offer up thoughts like;
This little bit won’t matter
I will get back onto it tomorrow
I’m too old, my best days are behind me
I don’t want others to think I am on a diet
I don’t want to make others feel uncomfortable
I don’t want to miss out
All of these thoughts though were just ways my brain was trying to take me off my path. It didn’t want me to lose weight, it wanted me to keep eating the way I already was, as that was what was familiar. It wasn’t until I was willing to stay on my path, that I was able to achieve my goal.
One of the first things I do with all of my clients is create their plan, their path. We list all of the actions they will need to take in order to hit their goal. We then list all of the things that could potential derail them and build counter measures in their plan to mange for them.
The plan is the path, and anything that is not on the path is taking them away from their goal. I like to think of it like a river flowing and picturing all of these streams meandering off from the main river. Any action you take that is not on your path, is like one of those streams, taking you on a path away from your goal.
At your day progresses and you are following actions that are on your path, you can relax knowing you are getting closer to your goal. As I tell my clients, you follow the plan, your path, you will get your results, no question.
Anytime you are presented with a choice, you can check in with your plan. Does the action keep you on the path, or is it a stream taking you away from your goal? Such a simple visualisation, but so effective.
As the tendency when we are faced with a choice that is not on our path is to rationalise, to start questioning, or act confused. But when you have gone through the process of being really clear about your goal. Outlining the actions on your path and also identifying those that potentially will take you off the path, then it becomes a lot harder to rationalise, question or act confused.
So if you haven’t hit your goal weight yet, then I encourage you to go through this process. Grab a piece of paper, write your goal at the top of the page, draw 2 lines about 5cm apart down the middle (this is your path). Write the actions that you need to take in order to hit your goal. Then outside of your path brainstorm all of the things that take you off your path and for each think of an action you can take that will get you back on that path, or to stop you from taking that detour.
As you go through your day and your are faced with choices that may take you off your path, think of your path, think of the streams and think of your goal and remind yourself why you want to stay on your path.
The only thing that stands in your way of achieving your goal weight, or any goal you may have is you and the obstacles you have not yet resolved.
Now while this process is really simple, following it can be challenging, it is the following that I spend most of my time with my clients on. The reason it is hard is that you are having to go against your brains initial resistance. But one obstacle by one if you keep at it, you will achieve your goals and learn a skill that will completely change your life.
